I am loving motherhood! I spend 24/7 with this baby and it's so fun and doesn't get old. We have lot's of cuddle time, outside time, play time, exercise time, story time, song time. One of our fav things to do is play ball. I sit her on one end of the loveseat and I at the other. Then we roll this soft soccer ball back and forth (she got it for Christmas) and we are both all smiles and squeals of happiness. My baby loves to use her feet as weapons. She pushes them into my leg, pinches my skin with her toes and then twists and turns them. She loves to kick anything and everything near her feet. And she kicks hard! But that's not what I'm here to talk to you about today...
I'm actually not here to talk to you about anything specific. Just some random thoughts. Well, maybe random isn't the word I want.
I can't wait to have baby #2 then #3 (that is if I'm blessed to have more kids). If I were in my 20's, I'd probably try to get pregnant next month. But alas, I'm mid 30's so I feel I should wait until LO is 1 so my body has that time to rebuild calcium, iron and folic acid stores to give #2 a healthy start. Plus, I still have 4kg pregnancy weight I want to shed plus a little more. I want to be thinner at the start of this next pregnancy.
I lost 6kgs so far this month. In a nutshell, it's all about eating protein, veg, fats together and carbs, vegs together and fruit alone on empty stomach. Why? Protein requires a more acidic environment to digest whereas carbs (as in grains) require a more alkaline environment. If the two are eaten together you get indigestion. Fruits digest quickly thus they shouldn't be combined with other foods to avoid gas. And fats mixed with protein doesn't cause weight gain whereas carbs with fat equals weight gain. And I avoid sugars. I honestly don't feel deprived one teeny bit! I had loosened the "reins" to have a cheat meal today and I just don't need it. I had peanut butter on toast and popcorn. That was my cheat meal! I don't think I'll have a cheat day this coming week cuz like I said, I don't feel deprived.
FB is becoming so old news and quite boring. I want to leave but I have so many photos on there I don't want to lose them and I have no desire to download them all!! I've just decided to not really go on it anymore.
I'd love to go on a family vacation. DH and I haven't been anywhere except for our mini honeymoon a couple years ago. We went an hour away up the coast for 3 nights. We couldn't afford to do much. I'd be thrilled to just go camping! But DH has never gone camping and has a tainted idea of what camping is (sleeping in the bush with bugs and praying bad guys don't come and get us). He also thinks it's absolutely absurd to take a baby camping. Africans.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Things I Hate to Hear and Things I Can't Hear Enough
There are three things that people say to me as a mother that drive me bananas. Unfortunately, I hear these things often enough that now I have to blog vent about it.
1. "Watch that baby/look after that baby!" What the H.E.double hockey sticks is that suppose to mean?? Do people think I put my child in a pile of garbage while I run off to the spa for facials?! I WATCH MY CHILD thank you very much! That child is my life. I'm with her 24/7. She even comes with me when I go to the loo. She spends a lot of time in my arms or on my lap too. When we go somewhere, I sit in the backseat with her and we hold hands (unless she falls asleep). Her bed is beside mine and shall be until she is 1. When it's her bedtime, I check on her every few minutes to makes sure all is well. Now please, dont come and say I'm a crazy overprotective mother. She has her independent play time too on her activity mat and goes to sleep on her own in her own bed at bedtime. So the next person who says "look after that baby" is gonna get whipped with a car antennae.
2. "Your baby is so big! She eats too much." The ironic thing is the people who say this to me are fat women. Uh, look in the mirror honey! A. B. my baby is a few grams above average for the weight chart for her age. She's got some chub on her thighs and forearms but she's a baby. Babies aren't suppose to be skinny!! That cute little chub that I relish will go when she crawls and grows. C. she doesn't eat too much, especially based on the calculations of babies under 6months are to eat 120-150ml/kg a day. This point is starting to not bother me so much anymore cuz I've learned that people are dumb. They don't know what what and yet they flap their jaws. My baby is perfect and her needs are being met plus billions of loves and cuddles. The End.
3. "You must...." Everyone has two cents to contribute. Please stop with the advice. I've read the books and googled the information. I'm the mother, I know my child and I have instinct. Like every adult, each baby is a unique individual. I typically just smile and nod when people share their "knowledge" and then I go about my day.
The things that I can't hear enough are
1. "Your baby is sooo cute!" One time in the grocery store a lady and her young daughter were in awe over me babe. She then said she'd give me 4 million to adopt my baby (of course she wasn't totally serious) and of course I said no, she is priceless and mine!
2. "Your baby looks like you" Sometimes I wonder if it is meant to a compliment, but I take it as one cuz my baby is dang adorable in my opinion. Thank you :)
3. "Your baby smiles a lot" Yep, we try to have a happy little family and she does smile lots :)
1. "Watch that baby/look after that baby!" What the H.E.double hockey sticks is that suppose to mean?? Do people think I put my child in a pile of garbage while I run off to the spa for facials?! I WATCH MY CHILD thank you very much! That child is my life. I'm with her 24/7. She even comes with me when I go to the loo. She spends a lot of time in my arms or on my lap too. When we go somewhere, I sit in the backseat with her and we hold hands (unless she falls asleep). Her bed is beside mine and shall be until she is 1. When it's her bedtime, I check on her every few minutes to makes sure all is well. Now please, dont come and say I'm a crazy overprotective mother. She has her independent play time too on her activity mat and goes to sleep on her own in her own bed at bedtime. So the next person who says "look after that baby" is gonna get whipped with a car antennae.
2. "Your baby is so big! She eats too much." The ironic thing is the people who say this to me are fat women. Uh, look in the mirror honey! A. B. my baby is a few grams above average for the weight chart for her age. She's got some chub on her thighs and forearms but she's a baby. Babies aren't suppose to be skinny!! That cute little chub that I relish will go when she crawls and grows. C. she doesn't eat too much, especially based on the calculations of babies under 6months are to eat 120-150ml/kg a day. This point is starting to not bother me so much anymore cuz I've learned that people are dumb. They don't know what what and yet they flap their jaws. My baby is perfect and her needs are being met plus billions of loves and cuddles. The End.
3. "You must...." Everyone has two cents to contribute. Please stop with the advice. I've read the books and googled the information. I'm the mother, I know my child and I have instinct. Like every adult, each baby is a unique individual. I typically just smile and nod when people share their "knowledge" and then I go about my day.
The things that I can't hear enough are
1. "Your baby is sooo cute!" One time in the grocery store a lady and her young daughter were in awe over me babe. She then said she'd give me 4 million to adopt my baby (of course she wasn't totally serious) and of course I said no, she is priceless and mine!
2. "Your baby looks like you" Sometimes I wonder if it is meant to a compliment, but I take it as one cuz my baby is dang adorable in my opinion. Thank you :)
3. "Your baby smiles a lot" Yep, we try to have a happy little family and she does smile lots :)
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Baby's First Christmas
it was a lovely first for our family :) i had done the present shopping in november to avoid the crowds in the mall. we took her to sit on santa's lap last week. we took her to the ward christmas party on saturday and she got a present from santa then (stacker which is perfect for her). then yesterday, we sat her on the brown chair and she opened each present (slowly and with a little help) and she did pretty good ripping the paper off the gifts for a 4 month old. she's so dang cute! we then skyped with grandma. then she played on her activity mat (after nap time of course) with her new toys while i baked 5 dozen gingersnaps, baked 14 potatoes, roasted 2 pans of chicken and got the other stuff ready (beet salad, cucumber salad, corn on the cob, tzatziki) while hubby took care of baba and entertained guests (he can't do the kitchen stuff like i can), uncle onive braaied the borevors and the missionaries chilled and helped here and there. there was a lot of food. a lot! we've had people over for christmas luncheon for the past 3 years and each time there is just enough food. i was not interested in having to go to mcdonalds for christmas dinner this year so i went a bit overboard. we will be eating leftovers today and tomorrow. which is alright cuz then i don't have to worry about cooking.
cuz we'd been working hard the past couple days getting ready for yesterday, i've decided to do nothing today except relax, watch my christmas presents (twilight BD2, madagascar 3 and big bang theory season 2) and play with baby. i sat her on the brown couch and we played with her new soft ball. she loves it! we had so much fun rolling it back and forth. this woman is very smart and strong. then i read her the new book of colors/shapes/numbers/opposites. i have done a load of laundry tho cuz the mountain was big. but i think i'll just leave it at that one load. i also went swimming while hubby watched baby this morn. it is a hot hot summer day here in the southern hemi. we attempted a walk at 9:30am but it was waaay too dang hot and baby's legs were in the sun no matter what i did to hide them. so we scraped it 10mins into the walk.
see how cute the little woman is opening her pressies!
cuz we'd been working hard the past couple days getting ready for yesterday, i've decided to do nothing today except relax, watch my christmas presents (twilight BD2, madagascar 3 and big bang theory season 2) and play with baby. i sat her on the brown couch and we played with her new soft ball. she loves it! we had so much fun rolling it back and forth. this woman is very smart and strong. then i read her the new book of colors/shapes/numbers/opposites. i have done a load of laundry tho cuz the mountain was big. but i think i'll just leave it at that one load. i also went swimming while hubby watched baby this morn. it is a hot hot summer day here in the southern hemi. we attempted a walk at 9:30am but it was waaay too dang hot and baby's legs were in the sun no matter what i did to hide them. so we scraped it 10mins into the walk.
see how cute the little woman is opening her pressies!
Saturday, December 1, 2012
Yehaw!
I am thoroughly enjoying this stage of my baby-3 to 6 months! she's 3 months and 2 weeks. so delightful. she is still an adorable baby with the most kissable delicious cheeks but now she has a nice routine and has more play time and she "talks" a lot with me and smiles all the time and gets excited and loves to look at stuff and be outside. she's even doing funny things like she'll be on her activity mat tugging on her hanging toys and talking away at them, then she'll grab Cotton (her pink kitty) and put it beside her and will watch Three's Co and more often than not, laugh at the correct parts!
note mr and mrs roper on the screen, baby on one end of her "bark-a-lounger" and Cotton on the other end. I promise you, I did NOT set up the pink kitty or baby to sit as such, baby did it all on her own.
she'll make faces at things that smell bad. she does these ab crunches to sit upright-not that she lasts long in the upright position as she's still developing balance. she's really strong!! she's even got a few cute tickle spots and the way she wriggles with a cute smile and squeak when i gently tickle her. O.M.G. I can't get enough of this adorable child. i spend about 80% of the day saying "you are sooo cute!" she's clever too! when we have story time, she turns the page...the correct direction! she usually grabs more than 1 page at a time but at least she's got the jist of how to work a book. and she really pays attention to you while you talk to her. infact, she gets mad if she's trying to talk to you and you don't make eye contact. look at how she's listening to daddy.
she's like that with all conversations.
I love feeding her! she grabs my thumb in one hand, pinky in the other and squeezes (sometimes I think she will break my fingers) and gently twists/turns them. it's so cute. she has become an easily distracted eater though. her eyes are all over the place and she's turning her head every direction that a sound comes. this woman even tries to watch the tv while eating! and if daddy enters the room, she gets all wide eyed and bushy tailed. if I talk to her she stops eating and flashes me some smiles then tries to conversate back. her feet are all over the place too. when i pause to wipe her chin she ab crunches up and tries to grab at her milk back to her mouth and gives a couple "hey!s" until the food is back in her mouth. she's got an appetite fo sure. i love it.
i miss her when she sleeps. but am glad she is sleeping cuz then i can get stuff done, like now i'm bloggin. i can also do some dishes, make dinner (chicken breyani tonight!) and of course express milk.
i've knocked the expressing schedule down to 4 times in the day and once at night when she wakes up sometime between 3-5am for her meal. it's much less stressful and i still get out the same amount of milk in a 24hr period so why should i knock myself out and express 8 times for the same results? i've done lot's of searching for info on partial feeding. there's not much out there. it's either breast is best or formula amounts for baby. there's been studies on just 50ml of breast milk a day providing a host of amazing benefits for the little one, which makes me feel better. i can't help but wonder how different everything would have been if baby and i were successful at est EBF. i'd been a lot less stressed and we'd have saved tonnes of money on lactation prescriptions, lactation herbals, breast pumps (yes plural), bottles and of course formula. that's on the top of my list when i go to heaven-why couldn't baby and i EBF????? but alas, there is purpose in all things (like maybe someone in my future will experience the same and i can provide "advice" and comfort) and it is what it is. o, i can say that now. i think i've finally stopped crying about it. i wont even try to describe the emotions felt behind this cuz it can't be described. only those who experience can understand. anyways, that's not what i want to talk about.
baby still loves bath time! can't wait till she's sitting without support so i can take the little basin outside and she can splash around while i sit beside and play with water squirting toys etc. i love the smiles she flashes me during bath time. her face is extra cute (if that's even possible).
here's what our day of fun looks like:
sometime between 6-8am-breakfast 1 (she eats 5x a day and once at night)
chats, smiles, cuddles in my bed as daddy has gone to work (her bed is in our room. she used to sleep beside me in my bed but she's grown and the bed isn't big enough for 3)
nap for mommy and baby-she usually falls asleep while playing with my hand, sooo cute
wash up and dressed in day clothes
then we begin the 2.5 hr intervals of the following-
activity time (once a day it's outside and once a day mommy has exercise time while baby plays on activity mat), meal time, variety time (hang laundry with mommy/story time/song time/scripture time), nap time
she's pretty good at napping...now. she didnt used to be but as i look back, it's cuz i didn't have any kind of routine in place for her nor did i get that she needed a little help to take a nap after a certain period of being awake. that's why we had a bit of a fussy baby. anyways, live and learn. i think special spirits are chosen to be the first born cuz the parents don't really know what they're doing and need a hardier baby to practice on.
advice for future mamas-spend more time reading/learning what to do with baby when baby comes. spend less time stressing on pregnancy. i was so obsessed with the pregnancy and upcoming birthing that i didn't really prepare for what to do once the baby comes! and to know what the baby needs more in the way the needs are to be met. also read-Baby Sense and the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. 2 books i wish i had known about/encouraged to read while pregnant.
anyways, can't wait to give baby her first bites of solids! and of coures, baby's first Christmas :) presents are bought and wrapped already. not that she'll really know what's going on or even how to open the present but it is her first christmas so it's important. she will also be sitting on santa's knee.
note mr and mrs roper on the screen, baby on one end of her "bark-a-lounger" and Cotton on the other end. I promise you, I did NOT set up the pink kitty or baby to sit as such, baby did it all on her own.
she'll make faces at things that smell bad. she does these ab crunches to sit upright-not that she lasts long in the upright position as she's still developing balance. she's really strong!! she's even got a few cute tickle spots and the way she wriggles with a cute smile and squeak when i gently tickle her. O.M.G. I can't get enough of this adorable child. i spend about 80% of the day saying "you are sooo cute!" she's clever too! when we have story time, she turns the page...the correct direction! she usually grabs more than 1 page at a time but at least she's got the jist of how to work a book. and she really pays attention to you while you talk to her. infact, she gets mad if she's trying to talk to you and you don't make eye contact. look at how she's listening to daddy.
she's like that with all conversations.
I love feeding her! she grabs my thumb in one hand, pinky in the other and squeezes (sometimes I think she will break my fingers) and gently twists/turns them. it's so cute. she has become an easily distracted eater though. her eyes are all over the place and she's turning her head every direction that a sound comes. this woman even tries to watch the tv while eating! and if daddy enters the room, she gets all wide eyed and bushy tailed. if I talk to her she stops eating and flashes me some smiles then tries to conversate back. her feet are all over the place too. when i pause to wipe her chin she ab crunches up and tries to grab at her milk back to her mouth and gives a couple "hey!s" until the food is back in her mouth. she's got an appetite fo sure. i love it.
i miss her when she sleeps. but am glad she is sleeping cuz then i can get stuff done, like now i'm bloggin. i can also do some dishes, make dinner (chicken breyani tonight!) and of course express milk.
i've knocked the expressing schedule down to 4 times in the day and once at night when she wakes up sometime between 3-5am for her meal. it's much less stressful and i still get out the same amount of milk in a 24hr period so why should i knock myself out and express 8 times for the same results? i've done lot's of searching for info on partial feeding. there's not much out there. it's either breast is best or formula amounts for baby. there's been studies on just 50ml of breast milk a day providing a host of amazing benefits for the little one, which makes me feel better. i can't help but wonder how different everything would have been if baby and i were successful at est EBF. i'd been a lot less stressed and we'd have saved tonnes of money on lactation prescriptions, lactation herbals, breast pumps (yes plural), bottles and of course formula. that's on the top of my list when i go to heaven-why couldn't baby and i EBF????? but alas, there is purpose in all things (like maybe someone in my future will experience the same and i can provide "advice" and comfort) and it is what it is. o, i can say that now. i think i've finally stopped crying about it. i wont even try to describe the emotions felt behind this cuz it can't be described. only those who experience can understand. anyways, that's not what i want to talk about.
baby still loves bath time! can't wait till she's sitting without support so i can take the little basin outside and she can splash around while i sit beside and play with water squirting toys etc. i love the smiles she flashes me during bath time. her face is extra cute (if that's even possible).
here's what our day of fun looks like:
sometime between 6-8am-breakfast 1 (she eats 5x a day and once at night)
chats, smiles, cuddles in my bed as daddy has gone to work (her bed is in our room. she used to sleep beside me in my bed but she's grown and the bed isn't big enough for 3)
nap for mommy and baby-she usually falls asleep while playing with my hand, sooo cute
wash up and dressed in day clothes
then we begin the 2.5 hr intervals of the following-
activity time (once a day it's outside and once a day mommy has exercise time while baby plays on activity mat), meal time, variety time (hang laundry with mommy/story time/song time/scripture time), nap time
she's pretty good at napping...now. she didnt used to be but as i look back, it's cuz i didn't have any kind of routine in place for her nor did i get that she needed a little help to take a nap after a certain period of being awake. that's why we had a bit of a fussy baby. anyways, live and learn. i think special spirits are chosen to be the first born cuz the parents don't really know what they're doing and need a hardier baby to practice on.
advice for future mamas-spend more time reading/learning what to do with baby when baby comes. spend less time stressing on pregnancy. i was so obsessed with the pregnancy and upcoming birthing that i didn't really prepare for what to do once the baby comes! and to know what the baby needs more in the way the needs are to be met. also read-Baby Sense and the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. 2 books i wish i had known about/encouraged to read while pregnant.
anyways, can't wait to give baby her first bites of solids! and of coures, baby's first Christmas :) presents are bought and wrapped already. not that she'll really know what's going on or even how to open the present but it is her first christmas so it's important. she will also be sitting on santa's knee.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Pink
is how I'm feeling now. My baby is napping!!! Ahh, nice and calm. She had 3 nice naps yesterday and went to bed nicely too. She's on her 3rd nap now. When she awoke from her am nap (I bring her into bed with me so I can fall asleep after our morning chat as daddy has gone off to work early so there is plenty o room for wee one), I peeked in to the room to see how she was. And there she was quietly looking around until she caught my eye, then she flashed her gorgeous infectious smiles and started her baby babbles and squeals of delight. That stuff makes my day. She's such a dolly faced delight. She had a bath this morning. She loves baths. She gets all wide eyed and bushy tailed when she sees the towel...she knows whats about to happen. She's a clever 11 week old. She's taken to holding the bottle with both hands to feed herself these days. I'm sure once she's walking, she'll potty train herself. She even watches Three's company with me. No joke. I sit her in my lap after she eats (must keep her upright for a bit on account of her reflux you know, soon she'll grow out of that) and she literally watches Three's Company from beginning to end. Plus, I got to exercise this morning. That always makes a lady feel good.
It's hot out. Christmas is coming. Never feels like Christmas with the heat. I feel more Christmasy in July here than December. I pray next December, we'll have enough mula to take a vacay up north to have some fun in the snow with Santa.
Well. That's my story morning glory...today anyways.
It's hot out. Christmas is coming. Never feels like Christmas with the heat. I feel more Christmasy in July here than December. I pray next December, we'll have enough mula to take a vacay up north to have some fun in the snow with Santa.
Well. That's my story morning glory...today anyways.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Blue
is a bit how I'm feelin today. I feel like I'm not doin much as a mom. Like a couple of my other friends with babies are doing things like cooking fancy food, crafting clever home tools, caring for older children, breastfeeding (I may be pained on this forever) all while devoting love to their DH. I on the other hand am eating instant oatmeal, growing a pile of laundry, wearing the same outfit everyday like a cartoon character, expressing 15ml of milk (down from 30ml when I was on the lactation Rx) and ripping my hair out in frustration at trying to be a semi good mom to a very high maintenance allbeit incredibly cute baby. Sometimes, I even forget to drink water. I do not have it together and I am not super mom like my friends. I wish I had some family or friends in this country to help and bring us a casserole or clean my bathroom. My DH is trying his hardest by working, cooking once in awhile, doing dishes and helping with our sweet little primadonna. My mom's curse worked-when I was a young challenging child she said "I hope you have babies exactly like you! Then you will know what I've gone through." and here we are with an adorable, smiley baby who is exactly like me-stubborn, demanding, easily pissed off and wants it her way. I love her more than life and want the best for her. This is why I'm going crazy.
Isn't she cute!!
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Have I Done Enough?
let's just state the obvious- motherhood is THEE hardest job on the planet!! i've worked for the govt with strict policies and procedures, a pharmacy full of ghetto grumpy customers, 2 very demanding realtors and a host of other jobs. they all pale in comparison to this. i knew it would be hard but didn't quite get just how hard, i mean i had nannied for 3 different families so taking care of children is no unknown event for me. and you know why motherhood is so hard? (this i figured out 2 days ago) because you are RESPONSIBLE for another LIFE that is 100% dependent on you for EVERYTHING-learning, development, nourishment in all sense of the word, love and any need they have. in a nanny/daycare job, you go home at the end of the day and are just responsible for their safety and wellbeing from 8-4 with a lunch break and other helpers (if daycare). but this is 24/7 FOREVER. that, my friend, is a lot of pressure!!! that's why it's so so hard. and to top it off, for the first 8 years, i'm accountable for their actions too. eiyeish!
don't get me wrong, i LOVE being a mother and LOVE LOVE LOVE my angel face who by the way i totally WOULD die for if i had to. she is the best blessing i've ever and could ever receive. it's true. the love you feel for this precious little being is something that cannot be described, it is to be experienced and even then it's tough to comprehend.
now please allow me a moment to vent a bit. babies are hard work. mainly cuz they can't tell you what is bothering them or what they need. they can only fuss/cry/smile in their communication efforts. it's a guess work. and when you think you've figured out what "that cry" means, it changes to mean something else different with age. oyvey.
breastfeeding. OMG, breastfeeding! had i known all the finer intricaces and challenges and emotions of it, i'd done a hell of a lot more in preparing for this trial. the number of tears i've shed surpass any tears i've shed over anything else in life, including losing a loved one (not minimizing the trial of this cuz this obviously sucks more but i digress). one thinks-easy, baby is instinctively designed to do it, women are naturally made to do it. so what's the big deal? well, it is something that can be damaged from day one with just one bad experience. the baby can build an aversion with just one wrong move (if sensitive enough), you can experience extreme physical soreness with an incorrect latch. you know what, i can't even touch on all that can happen here cuz there's books written on it (for a very good reason). just here's some advice if pregnant or going to get pregnant with baba number 1-study everything on breastfeeding and the how to's before baba comes so you can be prepared. cuz if it isn't successful, the emotional torment you feel is too much. again, i feel responsible for this little life and as the mother, i'm suppose to provide this miracle nutrition for her. but somehow between day 1 and today, something happened for her to gain an aversion. we did all those things to make it happen like using a cup and spoon to feed her for the first few weeks (to avoid nipple confusion and in hopes of her latching), SNS, blah blah blah. just we did it all and so far she's only done it 6 times in 10 weeks. i've been using an electric pump to keep my milk supply somewhat going incase she decides to nurse and so i can get at least 1 bottle of the miracle food into her. i know of 2 women who's babies took 3 months before they'd do it, so i'm hanging in strong (with the occasional emotional breakdown) until that mark in hopes that maybe she'll do it. i'm grateful that she has done it 6 times tho, cuz it's a beautiful fulfulling experience and also, i know she CAN do it, she's just refusing to do it right now.
the basics. well, we've covered a part of eating but as you see i can only do 1 bottle a day and of course that's not enough. so enter formula. i'd cry everytime she had to eat for the first 2 weeks of her life. i'm grateful my husband is awesome and fed her during that time. not only did he feed her, he had this great commentary going on to entertain her and i. but now, we use bottles so there's the washing and careful preparation of formula. and this woman likes to eat! she's got my appetite. she wants to eat every 1.5-2hours, even though the books say baby should be eating every 3-4hours now. first off, do any of you out there go that long without passing something through your lips whether it be water, gum, or a snack? so why should we expect that of a baby who gets their drink, snack, nutrition, etc from their milk? plus, they're growing. next, cleansing. again i'm grateful for a hubby who's so helpful cuz bathtime requires 4 hands. baby loves bath time so it's fun for all of us. but the tricky part is drying her off well. she hates getting out of the bath. she is afterall naked and wet. uncomfortable. but babies have creases that are tough to dry properly. especially with a baby that moves as much as mine! and clipping her nails? o my! she don't keep her hands still unless she is eating. plus they're so tiny i can't see very well so i have to be extra careful. you know, more careful than i already am with my precious baby. and lastly, toilet etiquette. did you know that babies are born potty trained? they just lack the ability to get up and use the toilet. they don't like to pee/poo themselves. i mean, really, who does? we, "civilized" people, diaper train them. that's why baby will often pee AFTER you take off the diaper. that doesn't bother me. none of the diaper/toilet stuff, surprisingly, bothers me. it's just that she pees a lot and thus taking naps becomes an issue. who can sleep comfortably with a wet bottom? plus, again, she moves a lot making diaper changing a workout for both of us. plus she screams bloody murder 99% of the time during a diaper change. perhaps she's embarassed to have peed her pants.
sleep. or lack thereof. i knew i'd get little sleep. but the thing is, the sleep that we do get is interrupted sleep. that's the hard part! waking up naturally is nice. being woken up abruptly is not nice. i don't want to sleep like a baby. i want to sleep like an adult. who's the idiot that coined the phrase "sleeping like a baby" anyway? the other hard part is once you're woken up abruptly, you have to get moving quickly to the demands of the little noisy one that woke you up abruptly. you know that feeling when you first wake up, the one where you need to learn how to walk and see? try doing things in that state carefully with a precious baby.
mother. the one who gets put on the back burner. i don't mind putting myself off to the side to love and care for this cutey pie but i do miss some things like eating a meal all the way through when i'm hungry or showering. i've been trying to cut my nails for days now but there isn't time between expressing milk, washing bottles, preparing formula, changing diapers, cuddling baby bear, soothing baby bear, activity time, tummy time, story time, getting baby calmed to get some nap time, etc. and i really really do need to get back to exercising cuz my pre pregnancy pants dont fit nice! but when and where shall i accomplish this? the good thing is my biceps get their workout with growing baby.
household chores...get put to the side, sorta. if i was a normal person, they would totally get put to the side but i CANNOT function in a chaotic environment so the house does get some small attention. my husband, again, wonderfully takes a leadership role in accomplishing this. he has also become the head chef. i rarely cook. i don't have time. instant oatmeal and toast is my friend. baby does love to go hang laundry with me. she could be crying, but will stop when we go outside...most of the time.
emotions. you start to think about things you wouldn't normally consider before baby. such as, i can't take the stroller by the flowers cuz a bee might sting her or it's windy and i'm worried a contagious disease may be blowing in the wind. i cant even pee without taking the baby to be within my eye view. before my bedtime i wonder "have i done enough today?" did she get enough cuddles? did i feed her too much/too little? was she comfortable? was there enough tummy time? was she warm enough when we went outside? did i express enough times to maintain milk supply? did i engage her intellect enough to grow and develop? etc etc etc my husband wonderfully assures me that i'm a wonderful mother and he thanks me for all my hard work and continuing to express milk and not giving up (even though he told me in the beginning i can stop anytime and we can just do formula if it's too demanding or stressful for me)
all venting aside (is stating the obvious venting??), i love motherhood. it's something i'd been looking forward to since i picked up my first dolly. i'm glad my time is here. i can't believe it sometimes. when my baby FINALLY falls asleep, i watch her cutey face and wonder when she'll wake up so i can cuddle her and shower her with kisses again. she's been having a good afternoon nap right now :) this is good cuz she won't be grumpy. i'm sacrificing other things to write this long overdue blog (a nap myself and cutting my nails) but it's time to write. writing is therapeutic and an eye opener for me.
I'M ETERNALLY GRATEFUL FOR THE BLESSING OF MOTHERHOOD WITH THIS PRECIOUS LITTLE ANGEL FACE, HONEY BEAR, BABY GIRL OF MINE!!!
and i do have the best husband who helps at every turn and then some.
don't get me wrong, i LOVE being a mother and LOVE LOVE LOVE my angel face who by the way i totally WOULD die for if i had to. she is the best blessing i've ever and could ever receive. it's true. the love you feel for this precious little being is something that cannot be described, it is to be experienced and even then it's tough to comprehend.
now please allow me a moment to vent a bit. babies are hard work. mainly cuz they can't tell you what is bothering them or what they need. they can only fuss/cry/smile in their communication efforts. it's a guess work. and when you think you've figured out what "that cry" means, it changes to mean something else different with age. oyvey.
breastfeeding. OMG, breastfeeding! had i known all the finer intricaces and challenges and emotions of it, i'd done a hell of a lot more in preparing for this trial. the number of tears i've shed surpass any tears i've shed over anything else in life, including losing a loved one (not minimizing the trial of this cuz this obviously sucks more but i digress). one thinks-easy, baby is instinctively designed to do it, women are naturally made to do it. so what's the big deal? well, it is something that can be damaged from day one with just one bad experience. the baby can build an aversion with just one wrong move (if sensitive enough), you can experience extreme physical soreness with an incorrect latch. you know what, i can't even touch on all that can happen here cuz there's books written on it (for a very good reason). just here's some advice if pregnant or going to get pregnant with baba number 1-study everything on breastfeeding and the how to's before baba comes so you can be prepared. cuz if it isn't successful, the emotional torment you feel is too much. again, i feel responsible for this little life and as the mother, i'm suppose to provide this miracle nutrition for her. but somehow between day 1 and today, something happened for her to gain an aversion. we did all those things to make it happen like using a cup and spoon to feed her for the first few weeks (to avoid nipple confusion and in hopes of her latching), SNS, blah blah blah. just we did it all and so far she's only done it 6 times in 10 weeks. i've been using an electric pump to keep my milk supply somewhat going incase she decides to nurse and so i can get at least 1 bottle of the miracle food into her. i know of 2 women who's babies took 3 months before they'd do it, so i'm hanging in strong (with the occasional emotional breakdown) until that mark in hopes that maybe she'll do it. i'm grateful that she has done it 6 times tho, cuz it's a beautiful fulfulling experience and also, i know she CAN do it, she's just refusing to do it right now.
the basics. well, we've covered a part of eating but as you see i can only do 1 bottle a day and of course that's not enough. so enter formula. i'd cry everytime she had to eat for the first 2 weeks of her life. i'm grateful my husband is awesome and fed her during that time. not only did he feed her, he had this great commentary going on to entertain her and i. but now, we use bottles so there's the washing and careful preparation of formula. and this woman likes to eat! she's got my appetite. she wants to eat every 1.5-2hours, even though the books say baby should be eating every 3-4hours now. first off, do any of you out there go that long without passing something through your lips whether it be water, gum, or a snack? so why should we expect that of a baby who gets their drink, snack, nutrition, etc from their milk? plus, they're growing. next, cleansing. again i'm grateful for a hubby who's so helpful cuz bathtime requires 4 hands. baby loves bath time so it's fun for all of us. but the tricky part is drying her off well. she hates getting out of the bath. she is afterall naked and wet. uncomfortable. but babies have creases that are tough to dry properly. especially with a baby that moves as much as mine! and clipping her nails? o my! she don't keep her hands still unless she is eating. plus they're so tiny i can't see very well so i have to be extra careful. you know, more careful than i already am with my precious baby. and lastly, toilet etiquette. did you know that babies are born potty trained? they just lack the ability to get up and use the toilet. they don't like to pee/poo themselves. i mean, really, who does? we, "civilized" people, diaper train them. that's why baby will often pee AFTER you take off the diaper. that doesn't bother me. none of the diaper/toilet stuff, surprisingly, bothers me. it's just that she pees a lot and thus taking naps becomes an issue. who can sleep comfortably with a wet bottom? plus, again, she moves a lot making diaper changing a workout for both of us. plus she screams bloody murder 99% of the time during a diaper change. perhaps she's embarassed to have peed her pants.
sleep. or lack thereof. i knew i'd get little sleep. but the thing is, the sleep that we do get is interrupted sleep. that's the hard part! waking up naturally is nice. being woken up abruptly is not nice. i don't want to sleep like a baby. i want to sleep like an adult. who's the idiot that coined the phrase "sleeping like a baby" anyway? the other hard part is once you're woken up abruptly, you have to get moving quickly to the demands of the little noisy one that woke you up abruptly. you know that feeling when you first wake up, the one where you need to learn how to walk and see? try doing things in that state carefully with a precious baby.
mother. the one who gets put on the back burner. i don't mind putting myself off to the side to love and care for this cutey pie but i do miss some things like eating a meal all the way through when i'm hungry or showering. i've been trying to cut my nails for days now but there isn't time between expressing milk, washing bottles, preparing formula, changing diapers, cuddling baby bear, soothing baby bear, activity time, tummy time, story time, getting baby calmed to get some nap time, etc. and i really really do need to get back to exercising cuz my pre pregnancy pants dont fit nice! but when and where shall i accomplish this? the good thing is my biceps get their workout with growing baby.
household chores...get put to the side, sorta. if i was a normal person, they would totally get put to the side but i CANNOT function in a chaotic environment so the house does get some small attention. my husband, again, wonderfully takes a leadership role in accomplishing this. he has also become the head chef. i rarely cook. i don't have time. instant oatmeal and toast is my friend. baby does love to go hang laundry with me. she could be crying, but will stop when we go outside...most of the time.
emotions. you start to think about things you wouldn't normally consider before baby. such as, i can't take the stroller by the flowers cuz a bee might sting her or it's windy and i'm worried a contagious disease may be blowing in the wind. i cant even pee without taking the baby to be within my eye view. before my bedtime i wonder "have i done enough today?" did she get enough cuddles? did i feed her too much/too little? was she comfortable? was there enough tummy time? was she warm enough when we went outside? did i express enough times to maintain milk supply? did i engage her intellect enough to grow and develop? etc etc etc my husband wonderfully assures me that i'm a wonderful mother and he thanks me for all my hard work and continuing to express milk and not giving up (even though he told me in the beginning i can stop anytime and we can just do formula if it's too demanding or stressful for me)
all venting aside (is stating the obvious venting??), i love motherhood. it's something i'd been looking forward to since i picked up my first dolly. i'm glad my time is here. i can't believe it sometimes. when my baby FINALLY falls asleep, i watch her cutey face and wonder when she'll wake up so i can cuddle her and shower her with kisses again. she's been having a good afternoon nap right now :) this is good cuz she won't be grumpy. i'm sacrificing other things to write this long overdue blog (a nap myself and cutting my nails) but it's time to write. writing is therapeutic and an eye opener for me.
I'M ETERNALLY GRATEFUL FOR THE BLESSING OF MOTHERHOOD WITH THIS PRECIOUS LITTLE ANGEL FACE, HONEY BEAR, BABY GIRL OF MINE!!!
and i do have the best husband who helps at every turn and then some.
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