Blue

is a bit how I'm feelin today. I feel like I'm not doin much as a mom. Like a couple of my other friends with babies are doing things like cooking fancy food, crafting clever home tools, caring for older children, breastfeeding (I may be pained on this forever) all while devoting love to their DH. I on the other hand am eating instant oatmeal, growing a pile of laundry, wearing the same outfit everyday like a cartoon character, expressing 15ml of milk (down from 30ml when I was on the lactation Rx) and ripping my hair out in frustration at trying to be a semi good mom to a very high maintenance allbeit incredibly cute baby. Sometimes, I even forget to drink water. I do not have it together and I am not super mom like my friends. I wish I had some family or friends in this country to help and bring us a casserole or clean my bathroom. My DH is trying his hardest by working, cooking once in awhile, doing dishes and helping with our sweet little primadonna. My mom's curse worked-when I was a young challenging child she said "I hope you have babies exactly like you! Then you will know what I've gone through." and here we are with an adorable, smiley baby who is exactly like me-stubborn, demanding, easily pissed off and wants it her way. I love her more than life and want the best for her. This is why I'm going crazy.

Isn't she cute!!